Next Comes WHAT

With his massively successful TEDx talk and bestselling book,“Start with Why,” Simon Sinek popularized the idea of “the why.” In the book, Sinek breaks down the power of knowing your why and shows how to use it to propel yourself/your business forward. 

First, he implores us all to figure out our own why. Once we know our why, Sinek tells us to figure out the “how” and then, the “what.” 

It’s a great framework. Start with what you believe in—your why—and then work backwards. 

So according to Sinek, after why comes how, right? But when I put the concept into practice, I found myself getting lost between trying to define how to accomplish my why and defining what it actually takes to accomplish my why in the best way possible. 

That’s a lot of whys, hows, and whats. 

I know.

Let me explain…

After I sold my business, I knew I needed to figure out what was next.  

My why was clearly defined—I wanted to provide a safe, comfortable, and happy life for my family and help people make sense of a complex world. So I moved on to the how, but was immediately uneasy. 

The challenge is that the why is too open ended. I could accomplish some version of that why in hundreds of different ways. I realized that if I wasn’t clear on what exactly I was trying to accomplish, if I defined the how before the what, I was going to miss the target. The how seemed overwhelming without the what. 

So I switched the order. I defined the what before the how. I broke my why into two pieces: family and helping others. Then I wrote down what I thought the ideal version of those two things would be. 

This exercise allowed me to have a clear vision of what I wanted to accomplish—a vision that was out of my immediate reach, but something that I could work towards, something that I could measure the how against. I could now ask myself, “does this ‘how’ get me closer or farther from the ideal version of what I want?”

My what was my North Star. My reference point. My guide.

Now I use my what like a GPS. When I have a new idea or read an article, I ask myself, "Does applying this to my life take me closer to what I want, or farther from it?"

Like me, you might find yourself getting off course from time to time. And it’s probably because you didn’t define what you wanted in the first place. So when something novel comes your way, you take the bait. You think to yourself, "That sounds nice. I’ll do that!" and you change course and head off in a new direction. But over time, you get frustrated because you feel like you’re not getting anywhere. And the truth is, you probably aren't. You aren't getting anywhere because you’re not heading anywhere. You haven't defined what you actually want. The what, the North Star, keeps you on track. 

As with most things, this process is easier said than done. The biggest pitfall that I’ve experienced is reverting to the how before establishing the what. 

When I decided to start a career in tech, I was worried that few would understand my non-traditional career path. I kept going back to “how am I going to make this leap?” “How” questions flooded my mind. I had to silence the desire to solve for how, and stay focussed on defining my what. The what is what set me free. 

So the next time you make a change in your life, think first about your personal why. Then think second about what exactly you want the change to look like. And save the “how am I going to do that?” question for the end. 

As time goes on, you can check back in and ask yourself, “Am I getting closer to what I want?” If you’re on track, keep going! And if you’re not, then stop and regroup. 

We all want to head towards our North Star, to feel like we’re on track. If we can start with why, define our what, and end with how, we’ll have a beautiful journey to an intentional destination.